Log in

Its Such a Waste to be Wasted in the First Place [entries|friends|calendar]
Business, Not Your's INC

[ website | Disclaimer ]
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[03 Jul 2011|10:16am]

I don't know what hurts more. Being mislead repeatedly (which means I fucking trusted you) or the fact that i keep falling for it. Or is it that you drop a bomb on me and disappear?

I hope it's worth it. Just say what you mean. Mean what you say and say what you mean. You can make me the bad guy if you want but this is the last second chance.

I'm not perfect and I've got shit to work through. I'm embarrassed that I let you get this deep. I thought there was something pure and real in you but maybe I was wrong. I hold into the hope that it'll get better but if time has shown me anything is that it never does. You just learn to live with the hurt and the bullshit.

It's hard to be reaching out for a hand to hold only to realize that there isnt anyone there...

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

1 wish you were here xDo you think you can tell?

The Story of Us [26 May 2011|09:03am]

This is looking like a contest
Of who can act like they care less
But I liked it better when you were on my side
The battle's in your hands now
But I would lay my armor down
If you'd say you'd rather love than fight
Do you think you can tell?

[18 May 2011|07:26pm]
I'm purging.
Comment if you'd like to remain
otherwise I wish you all well.
2 wish you were here xDo you think you can tell?

[09 May 2011|09:42pm]
Do you think you can tell?

[13 Apr 2011|08:36pm]
i am a walking, talking anxiety attack.
1 wish you were here xDo you think you can tell?

[26 Mar 2011|08:48pm]

think what you want about me
i know the truth
Do you think you can tell?

[18 Mar 2011|08:53am]
grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change
the courage to change the things i can
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Do you think you can tell?

[30 Dec 2010|03:17pm]
Requiem æternam dona eis, Domine. Et lux perpetua luceat eis.

Grant them eternal rest oh lord. And let perpetual light shine upon them
Do you think you can tell?

[18 Dec 2010|09:26am]
just an fyi, to remind myself sometime down the road

dec 2010 has been prob one of the worst months of my entire life and its not even over yet. death and distruction literally everywhere i go.
but so far all the people closest have made it out alive. thank fucking god.

cw car
on and on and on
2 wish you were here xDo you think you can tell?

[10 Oct 2010|09:58am]
you know
i resent performers or whatever that only go to college campuses. they never advertise to the public and those stupid little fucks who have all of mom and dads money get first pick.
i suppose i wouldve gone to college if i had the chance, or really if i didnt get fucked over by the system but i dont regret not going either.
im in the same boat as everyone else except i dont have that very expensive piece of paper showing how smart i am. does schooling really overtake experence? ive been working in my current field for almost 3 years now, total of 6 if you count retail too and youre going to tell me because this douchebag spent $200,000 on a piece of paper that theyre better than 6 years of my life?


sometimes i wonder what i wouldve made of myself if i had the chance because to be honest, i have no more of an idea of what i want to be now than i did then.
Do you think you can tell?

[16 Jul 2010|08:48pm]
hey the stars are gone, everybody cmon.
Do you think you can tell?

[31 May 2010|11:52am]
today is 6 years since my grandfather died. i cant say im sad, but it definately was the beggining of a turn of events that sorta shook my world up. if my grandfather had still been alive when i was thrown out im fairly certain they wouldve been out too. if only if only if only

ill never know what couldve been had he lived. but its okay. thats life i guess right? we have to play the hand were dealt, you cant waste your time wishing things had happened a different way or whatever. i just wish my sister understood that.
Do you think you can tell?

[07 May 2010|07:53pm]
jesus christ
just leave me alone, i dont want plans not this weekend or next weekend, i just want to spend a day by myself so i can fucking relax and release all the shit thats bothering me... i need to decompress and im not being allowed the time or space to do it and i just dont understand.

and can you please just explain why the guys i want are all flakey? why is it so much to want commitment?

and i am sorry p, but you are not tall enough or good enough in bed for me to excuse the fact that you flaked on me for like a whole fucking month. so you can consider this shit over kiddo.
2 wish you were here xDo you think you can tell?

[01 May 2010|11:50pm]
this pollen is bad. i feel like i have bug bites inside my throat. also the whole no water thing better be done real quick, im not feelin this at all

so far this may sucks
Do you think you can tell?

[20 Apr 2010|08:47am]
chill bitch. chill.
Do you think you can tell?

[17 Apr 2010|11:44am]
people are so funny. theres still that little bit of crazy just underneath your skin. its okay though. itll come back through eventually.

chris had to put lb to sleep yesterday. i knew it was a long time coming, he knew too, but i dont think i was prepared for how it would make me feel. i guess you never really know until it happens and at the end of the day it just brings your own mortality into the forefront and i think everyone is a little afraid of that.

i see how lonely he is, and it breaks my heart a thousand times. im not there. i cant be there. but i see him whithering away into nothing. but maybe this will be a change of pace. who knows. he called me at like 5 this monring and we spent about 2 hours on the phone just talking about lb and life and death. i just want to reach out and never let go but i think hell always be just out of reach.
Do you think you can tell?

[28 Mar 2010|11:37am]
i never do this right...
but thats okay i guess.
im addicted to that feeling and i have no idea when itll happen again.
Do you think you can tell?

[15 Mar 2010|08:38pm]
you are useless
Do you think you can tell?

[14 Mar 2010|11:48pm]
i hate waiting.
Do you think you can tell?

[22 Feb 2010|11:49pm]
alright ill say it

im lonely

spending last night with you just makes it worse, its not that i want to get back together, i dont . at all. but just being able to hold ur hand made me feel real again i guess. it was sureal...

and the one that got away. every so often i take what little information i have to try and track you down, maybe you left her, maybe you didnt. but i wonder what couldve happened.

i dont know, ive got multiple men in my life at the moment an im not sure i like any of them.

i want to watch lars and the real girl. again.

Do you think you can tell?

[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]